Looking in my Rearview: Feeling 22 💫

      With the COVID-19 situation going on right now, there have been a lot of unexpected moments. As I reflect on my 22nd birthday this past month, now is an even more appropriate time to sit back and ruminate upon the lessons I’ve learned. This change was also less hectic for me. Since I have done online schooling throughout my entire college experience, I am not as affected as others in this area of my life. In fact, because of my school scheduling, I technically did not have a Spring break as one of my classes was still in effect. Ultimately, my schedule has progressed as usual. Last year, I wrote 21 things I’ve learned in 21 Years. Creating an updated perspective, a year later, was a great way to reflect on changes and perpetuating lessons. 

1. Let go 
   1. So, this is a reinforced lesson in my life continuously. People come and go. Situations arise and go. I have taken this past year to…
2. Accept 
   1. What comes and goes. Fighting what I have no control over leads to a more difficult situation than what is currently a concern. With this acceptance, I have learned to…
3. Go with the flow 
   1. I think this is why I find peace in the ocean. There were a lot of ups and downs this past year. I enjoyed classes and, other times, I was caught up in the stress of reaching specific standards. Things went really well, and then they didn’t. It seemed as if everything was great or everything came crashing down. I made friends and lost some in the process, which, most of the time, equated to my newfound companionship with…
4. Boundaries 
   1. You can still care about someone from a distance through the establishment of boundaries. Creating a healthy space can still equate to love. Just pay attention to how people treat you and adjust accordingly. This doesn’t mean treating someone poorly if they treat you poorly. It means loving yourself enough to limit your exposure to those and, ultimately, showing them what you will and will not accept.
5. Respond with love 
   1. I can still have boundaries and be pleasant towards others. Anyone can be hateful; usually, this response is an indication of internal turmoil. Using this situation as an opportunity to show them, love provides them with a newfound perspective.  I talk about my experience with relationships in Interpersonal Relationships: Emotions 
6. Don’t let other’s perceptions impact you 
   1. When people hurt me, I was able to view their hurt from their own projections instead of allowing their actions to make me feel as if there is something wrong with me. 
7. One’s response is a self-perception 
   1. I used to get disappointed in people when they didn’t treat me a certain way. Not going to lie, I still get hurt, but now I understand their actions have nothing to do. Their efforts are a reflection of their personal conflicts. I acknowledge this, but I no longer allow my understanding to equate to acceptance of being treated poorly. This change has been the most influential component of my well-being. 
8. Change 
   1. My usual is reading blogs, online schooling, car rides, self-reflection, organizing. There is always a sort of self-made schedule to push me towards a greater sense of well-being. However, there was a positive change. I spent the Summer at the beach, and it allowed me to reframe my state of mind when it comes to the idea of altered circumstances. I reference this change in B.E.A.C.H. 
9. Rest 
   1. The story of Martha vs. Mary surfaced on the blog many times. I gave in to my body’s need for rest. I took only one class this Summer, and I chose to drop a course that I knew would be too difficult for me to carry on. 
10. Balance 
    1. There is the importance of finding the balance between giving and taking to optimize a sense of well-being. 
11. Mindfulness / meditation 
    1. I took a class that changed my whole perspective. I began to spend time alone in my thoughts for five minute spirts. It has done wonders for anxiety and really allowed me to look into healthier coping mechanisms. With this comes a sense of…
12. Inner-peace 
    1. I am strange in the sense that I find patience in simple things, but a season of waiting always makes me anxious. I am working on reframing my perspective and looking at the importance of this cycle within one’s life. 
13. Look within
    1. This is the first time where I spent a good chunk of the year in another place. The only source of peace I find comes from within. No matter the location, my soul stays with me and guides me towards a sense of comfort. 
14. Expectations 
    1. I have a lot of expectations. I set high goals for myself and get upset when I don’t achieve them. This changed immensely. I always create a to-do list, but instead of adding multiple tasks, I set an overarching schedule. I talk about my switch from goals to intentions when discussing my Summer 2019 Intentions
15. Look for the blessings
    1. Many times I have been taken on a weird and unexpected course. However, I have found that allowing the circumstance to teach me new things creates an environment in which I see positive outcomes. 
16. Speak your truth 
    1. The external circumstances of the COVID-19 situations have crept into my heart at times, causing anxiety. Surprisingly, I have remained calm regarding the virus itself. I think being immune-compromised allowed me to have pre-existing coping mechanisms regarding handling the prospect of sickness. This allowed me to be thankful for how God has used my illness and encouraged me to publicly discuss it for the first time. I discuss my thoughts in Calmness in the Storm
17. He is in control 
    1. It’s funny how God uses situations such as these to remind you of internal differences and perspectives that were never previously examined. He truly controls different elements of my life to create reassurance in His plan for my life. 
18. Gratitude 
    1. I apply an analytic perspective when reflecting on my situations. As a result, I have found that there is always a silver lining. These moments of stillness allowed for an altered perspective when examining asking myself: Are Stagnancy and Growth Synonymous?
19. Follow your passion 
    1. Always follow your passion. I have found that when I am not passionate about something, it usually detracts from my purpose. If I hadn’t followed this guideline, I would not be where I am with academics. I reblog a post What I learned from a good “bro-hug” which heightens a component of psychology. I also reference the personal applications of my college classes when discussing Interpersonal Relationships. 
20. Take it slow 
    1. Always allow moments for breathing. Take time in the morning or nighttime. I really heightened this in my blog Fall 2019 Intentions!
21. Self-love
    1. Welp, I love myself. I began to realize who I really am, what I enjoy, and what I don’t enjoy. 
22. Vulnerability 
    1. I’ve mentioned this several times throughout my writing. I am big on working through this as I push forward and make the most out of the guidance that God provides. I am hopeful that this will shine through as I continue blogging. 

Blessings!
Kiki